We changed one more time before we pulled our shirts back on and headed outside with our baskets of goodies.They had a nice fire going in the early dusk and were very comfortably sitting around it talking. Helen was very effectively acting as a go-between for Stella and Sarah. As it turned out, much to my surprise, even though Stella was quite familiar with Tom as the Sheriff, it was only on that basis that he was known to her. Stella was assuring Sarah that her confidence process for relationships had changed remarkably in the recent past. She confessed that she would normally be quite slow in accepting new people into her trust. Now, it seemed to her amazement, it only took that Helen trusted them. Perhaps that wouldn’t be true of all financial and legal situations, but it certainly seemed to be true for social and these ‘playful’ situations.Sarah conceded that she has had some trouble in developing new social friends herself. They had only come out to this county about 15 years. Unfortunately, I am plagued with a biological preponderance for self-doubt which he was challenging me to face head on. My mother hadn't bonded with me during her pregnancy thus I was left challenged to form healthy, loving relationships as an adult. My brain had been wired differently in the womb than most people's, my subconscious mind operated under the assumption that I was inherently unlovable and intrinsically without value despite how much work I'd done on myself, no matter how many rituals I'd performed, regardless of how many pages I'd written in my journal or affirmations I'd recited in the mirror, even in spite of how wonderful I believed myself to be in my heart. I'd taken tremendous strides toward healing and I had shown marked improvement and I was more than willing to exert the effort needed for me to tackle the internal demons that had been preventing me from attracting someone who was capable of loving me unconditionally.Apparently, I was doing something right,.
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